15 Months

I get so many comments on her hair.  I don't even know what to say anymore.  It has thinned on the sides so it's baby bunny fine.  And the spot on the back of her head has gotten bigger. But the top ... the top is growing.  People are in awe.  I don't know what to say.  Yeah I know seems weird.  I'm working on it.

Our schedule of late is I get the boys up, she cat naps with Dad.  She wakes up about 730 hungry.  I feed her she goes back to sleep.  Usually on my chest while I play on the computer and drink coffee and the boys eat breakfast and watch Mickey.

On school days I feed her again at 830 and get everyone in the car and going.  On none school days she wakes up somewhere around 9 and I feed her and we go run errands or whatever we have to do that day.  There's no real feeding schedule.  I just feed her when she squawks at me.

The boys eat lunch about 1130 or 12.  Nap time is around 1230 or 1.  As of Saturday, G is now doing quiet time in J's currently unused nursery upstairs.  He has a pallet and a bunch of books and he stays up there until 3.

D is then in the boys room, and so far he has stayed in his own bed (versus wrestling with his brother in G's bed) and taken good naps.  There was no napping taking place for a myriad of reasons.  One of them being G is five years old and doesn't really need the nap, and D can hear him reading or rustling pages and it just kept him up.

The first day of the separate nap times D was fine, didn't notice.  Day 2 he was like, say what?  And he screamed for G for about ten minutes.  But then he got in bed and went to sleep.

We shall see what day 3 will bring.

I know 1-3 is a long time for G.  I'm going to put together a folder of school work and have him work on that and read his books during that period.  But as long as J is itty bitty, this nap time is sometimes the only break I get.  In true baby fashion she often sleeps better during the day than she does at night.  Though that is slowly changing.

From 1-3 Julia and I hang out in the living room and she nurses and sleeps and I watch television.  Occasionally she will let me lay her down and I will ... watch more tv.  But this time I can eat something or lay down or play on the computer without a baby on me.  Occasionally I will be responsible and use this time for chores.

When the boys wake up we do whatever and then 5ish J starts wanting to nurse round the clock.  I feed the boys about 530, feed her as they are eating, then try to make us dinner as PBS Newshour is coming on.  Hopefully Dad is home by 630.  If he is the kids stay up a bit.  If he's not it's up to play in the bath tub.  I aim to have everyone in their beds by 730.

J and I then go downstairs and repeat the nap time routine.  Nurse, sleep, nurse sleep.  Sometimes she goes peacefully into her deeper nighttime sleep.  Others she's a hot mess and has to scream for thirty minutes before she'll fall asleep.  On a good night she's in bed by 930.  The next feeding is anytime between 1230 - 330.  There's no consistency.  Since her shots last Tuesday she's just been sleeping with me.  She was refluxing so bad due to a reaction to the rotavirus shot I think.  She seems to be better.

Last night she wouldn't settle and didn't go to sleep till after 1030.  But she slept until almost 4am.

At nap time the last few days I've slept her on her belly.  It's so much better for refluxing babies.  I know back to sleep is proven or whatever but I wonder if we wouldn't have all these kids on proton pump inhibitors (prevacid) if they slept on their bellies.  I have so many issues with back to sleep.  Which I will promptly forget about after we're out of the SIDS window.

 Lewis was out of town this weekend for a family funeral.  It's really no different than life during the week but the boys miss their time with dad.  We went to a friends house on Saturday and D liked this rocking horse and we watched the Derby.  The favored horse - and my pick, but duh he was favored - won.  It's always so much fun to watch horse races.

David is really just coming into his own.  His personality is fun and emerging.  He is beginning to understand that mama means business and he doesn't like negative consequences.  He seems to respond to losing toys or privileges.  It's a work in progress as I learn how to motivate / parent him.  He is emotional.  So very emotional.  Hard to say how much is him and how much is his age.  He is a typical two year old.  He seems so capable and mature and then all of a sudden ... he isn't.

He is so ready for school.  So ready.  He knows all his colors and can count to maybe 10?  Missing a few along the way but he's ahead of where G was at this age.  I'm excited for him to be in school in September.  I was doing the math, he won't go to Kinder until G is 8, and though they are two years apart in age, they will be three years apart in school, due to D's birthday.

J won't be in school until G is 10.  I have five more years.

Let the countdown begin.

 I cut the boys hair yesterday.  G is easy because clippers all over.

 D is harder because I don't like his hair that short.  He didn't like the clippers anyway.  I did his neck and it's a funny line because he kept wiggling.  But it's better than so shaggy.

 Sweetie face girl here.  She is a smiley happy soul.  As long as you hold her.  And in fairness for about a week now she's enjoyed the swing.  And she is no longer crying in the carseat automatically.  In fact as long as the car is moving she's downright pleasant (win!). She's taken a few naps in the swing even.  I think once she hit the 10lb mark (about 10 days ago) she didn't feel like she was getting thrown around too much or something.

Since the jaundice cleared up at week six she's been gaining better.  Her legs are chunking up.  Still not as big as her brothers at this same age, but growing very well and just very pretty.  The silent reflux (she doesn't spit up) is worrisome but the doctor seems convinced she's going to grow out of it. I say prayers she doesn't have EE.  Almost all the time.

D has started taking an active interest in her.  He had never once asked to hold her until this weekend.  Of course I had to honor his request but she was mad and hungry and tired.  He is a sweetie.  He has paid attention to her when we all were, when G was, but never has he actively sought her out.  But this past week he tried to give her her paci, talked to her as she was in her swing, and laid down with her on the floor during the few (two) times I had her on the floor for tummy time.

That's a funny story ... the doc was like we need her on her tummy to help her learn to roll.  I looked at him and in my head said, now why would I want to encourage that?  Immobility is so much safer.

In truth tummy time is just a beating for all involved.  Though I am trying to be mindful.

I get overwhelmed still, with the level of work I've taken on.  Thinking about how trapped I am and how I may never find a sitter who's willing to watch all three.  It's part hormones.  I push it all down and plan my 10th anniversary vacation.

This summer is going to be an adventure with all the trips we have planned.  The only part that gives me heartburn is sleeping.  But nothing will ever be as bad as Denver, because I'm not as much of an idiot as I was in Denver.  And if I survived Denver I can do anything.

I took a 6wk old to Miami.  I can do anything.  (Even though that totally wasn't hard because she just nursed and slept, nursed and slept).  But if you tell people that I did that they think I'm some sort of warrior mom.

I am, but not because of that.

I saw a list of things of "truths" with three kids and they were a lot of logistical issues.  All of which you can elevate by baby wearing.  I don't understand why more people don't wear their babies.  It's where they want to be; attached to mom.  It's an adjustment and you have to learn how to do it, but it's so worth it.  We have been able to do things and haven't been slowed down because of baby wearing.  Hopefully when she gets bigger and more mobile she still appreciates it.  I know I wore D a long time.

Well I gotta wake up sweet pea (who has slept on my chest the whole time I've typed this) and get to Whole Foods.  In my SUV.  With my latte. (not really on that last one.  well maybe not.  I might stop. We'll see).

I am such a cliche sometimes.