The After Birth
Just a couple thoughts ...
Hospital stays are about the moms, not the babies. I mean, okay, they are about the babies too, and making sure they are a-okay. But mostly, it's a time for mom to heal and recover. A family member (you know who you are!) had a baby in a birthing center and loved it all ... but I kept thinking how the hell is she going to recover at home? With no NURSERY?
I know it's like, so prima donna or first world or even suburban of me, but the nursery is a God send. With G I didn't utilize it as much as I should have. I think I sent him to the nursery once on the second night? This time ... I had to sleep. I had delivered at near midnight, was in L&D till almost 2, and didn't get to bed until well after 3AM. I slept for one hour, and then I was up waiting for the nursery to bring him back and they didn't till almost 5. I took cat naps on Wednesday but didn't sleep.
The other thing ... holy sweet heaven the post-partum cramping with number two is the worst part. Absolute worst. Labor pain hurts but it's like ... for a reason? I don't know it feels different. This is just agony. So the first time, I didn't take the hard core drugs I just took the motrin (which honestly is the best for it anyway). On Wednesday night I caved at 8PM and said bring on the vicadin. It didn't erase the pain, but it had the welcoming effect of making me tired. So I was able to sleep. And I sent little man to the nursery 3 or 4 times (from 8PM on). He had a lot of liquid in him and kept spitting up, I would have been up every thirty minutes sucking liquid from his mouth trying to help him get it all out. And while I would have done that ... I am a better mom today (and yesterday) because of the rest I got on Wednesday night. Which is why I say hospital stays are for the mom. Because truly we need to recover.
Yesterday we got discharged about 9:30. I was ready to go home. It felt wierd being in the hospital with this newborn that looked like G (and that honestly we kept calling G) and not having G with us. Don't get me wrong it's wierd having them both together but it's wierder not having them together.
G does great. He's always telling me what to do with "baby brodder." Put him in his bed mama, put him in his swing mama, feed him mama. He says he loves his baby brodder and asks to hold him (at least he did yesterday).
He does get upset when he wants something and I'm nursing and can't help him.
It will be a challenge to do all of this when I'm on my own. I'm taking advantage of the help right now.
So first night home ... He was up to eat every 2/3 hours (typical) and somewhere about midnight he started spitting up everything (typical of my kids). I did not freak out like last time. I did not even blink really. Hell I didn't even change the blanket, just rotated it to a clean corner and swaddled him again. I rested him on my chest and sat up against a pillow in the bed and we slept like that for an hour or so. Then I tried to lay him down again. He woke up spitting up again. So I said to hell with this and moved into the living room and laid him in the swing. He slept till 8:30 and I had to get him up for his doctors appointment.
He will sleep in the swing until this sorts out. I told the doctor this morning (more like, forcefully asked?) just to be sure I was doing the right thing. And he said absolutely. I'm not fooling around this time and I'm not freaking out about stupid things like last time (what if he never learns to sleep in a bed, isn't he supposed to lay flat?!?!). I have to sleep, at least four hours. I have another kid to think of.
And that's the whole thing isn't it? The first time you're stupid and you have the luxury of being stupid. You can let him sleep on you if you want, you can hold him the whole time, you can feed him every two hours. With another kid? Pffft. Little man has to fit into our schedule and he will and he'll be just fine.
Now post-partum. It's too early to say how the depression is going to rear it's ugly head. I'm expecting it. Last night it hit somewhere around 5PM. Today I feel a ton better; but I honestly think there is something to sunlight, vitamin D exposure and then being busy that just keeps it all at bay. Also the help. The fear comes just before bedtime because then it's all on me. As a nursing mother it's all me.
As to nursing, the kid latched five minutes after he was out and he's great at it. I can't remember exactly but I think he's more proficient that G was. Or at least hungrier. G would go 4 hours plus between feedings. Little man D is waking up every 2-3 hours like clockwork and eating for 15 minutes as is expected. I am so lucky to have good nursers and that it all works for me. I know so many women who struggle through.
Small differences ... D is not as awake as G was (in my memory). G seemed to always be alert. D wants to sleep all the time. Now, D was released from the hospital younger than G was. Maybe in another 24 hours I will start seeing more alert periods. G would eat no matter how upset he was. D has to calm down first, and take care of problem number one (whatever it is) before he will even think of latching.
Better write this all down because tomorrow it will all change!
I know it's like, so prima donna or first world or even suburban of me, but the nursery is a God send. With G I didn't utilize it as much as I should have. I think I sent him to the nursery once on the second night? This time ... I had to sleep. I had delivered at near midnight, was in L&D till almost 2, and didn't get to bed until well after 3AM. I slept for one hour, and then I was up waiting for the nursery to bring him back and they didn't till almost 5. I took cat naps on Wednesday but didn't sleep.
The other thing ... holy sweet heaven the post-partum cramping with number two is the worst part. Absolute worst. Labor pain hurts but it's like ... for a reason? I don't know it feels different. This is just agony. So the first time, I didn't take the hard core drugs I just took the motrin (which honestly is the best for it anyway). On Wednesday night I caved at 8PM and said bring on the vicadin. It didn't erase the pain, but it had the welcoming effect of making me tired. So I was able to sleep. And I sent little man to the nursery 3 or 4 times (from 8PM on). He had a lot of liquid in him and kept spitting up, I would have been up every thirty minutes sucking liquid from his mouth trying to help him get it all out. And while I would have done that ... I am a better mom today (and yesterday) because of the rest I got on Wednesday night. Which is why I say hospital stays are for the mom. Because truly we need to recover.
Yesterday we got discharged about 9:30. I was ready to go home. It felt wierd being in the hospital with this newborn that looked like G (and that honestly we kept calling G) and not having G with us. Don't get me wrong it's wierd having them both together but it's wierder not having them together.
G does great. He's always telling me what to do with "baby brodder." Put him in his bed mama, put him in his swing mama, feed him mama. He says he loves his baby brodder and asks to hold him (at least he did yesterday).
He does get upset when he wants something and I'm nursing and can't help him.
It will be a challenge to do all of this when I'm on my own. I'm taking advantage of the help right now.
So first night home ... He was up to eat every 2/3 hours (typical) and somewhere about midnight he started spitting up everything (typical of my kids). I did not freak out like last time. I did not even blink really. Hell I didn't even change the blanket, just rotated it to a clean corner and swaddled him again. I rested him on my chest and sat up against a pillow in the bed and we slept like that for an hour or so. Then I tried to lay him down again. He woke up spitting up again. So I said to hell with this and moved into the living room and laid him in the swing. He slept till 8:30 and I had to get him up for his doctors appointment.
He will sleep in the swing until this sorts out. I told the doctor this morning (more like, forcefully asked?) just to be sure I was doing the right thing. And he said absolutely. I'm not fooling around this time and I'm not freaking out about stupid things like last time (what if he never learns to sleep in a bed, isn't he supposed to lay flat?!?!). I have to sleep, at least four hours. I have another kid to think of.
And that's the whole thing isn't it? The first time you're stupid and you have the luxury of being stupid. You can let him sleep on you if you want, you can hold him the whole time, you can feed him every two hours. With another kid? Pffft. Little man has to fit into our schedule and he will and he'll be just fine.
Now post-partum. It's too early to say how the depression is going to rear it's ugly head. I'm expecting it. Last night it hit somewhere around 5PM. Today I feel a ton better; but I honestly think there is something to sunlight, vitamin D exposure and then being busy that just keeps it all at bay. Also the help. The fear comes just before bedtime because then it's all on me. As a nursing mother it's all me.
As to nursing, the kid latched five minutes after he was out and he's great at it. I can't remember exactly but I think he's more proficient that G was. Or at least hungrier. G would go 4 hours plus between feedings. Little man D is waking up every 2-3 hours like clockwork and eating for 15 minutes as is expected. I am so lucky to have good nursers and that it all works for me. I know so many women who struggle through.
Small differences ... D is not as awake as G was (in my memory). G seemed to always be alert. D wants to sleep all the time. Now, D was released from the hospital younger than G was. Maybe in another 24 hours I will start seeing more alert periods. G would eat no matter how upset he was. D has to calm down first, and take care of problem number one (whatever it is) before he will even think of latching.
Better write this all down because tomorrow it will all change!
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