Rules and Misunderstandings
This blog is interesting about how many rules parents (mostly moms) set up for themselves, and how they often feel like failures because these expectations are just ridiculous. The last part with the rules itself are funny only because of how true they are. I gave up on a lot of them, at about 4 months old, for various reasons.
But one of the last lines in the post is "no wonder postpartum is rampant."
People have such a misunderstanding about postpartum depression. It's just one more thing that women impose on themselves and set themselves up to fail. We judge each other for it. How could she not feel anything but happiness? Because sometimes it just doesn't work that way.
I wasn't happy. Nope. In the weeks after my sons birth I was not. happy. I loved my son. Knew him to be mine. But I felt this incredible responsibility to take incredible care of him and he cried and he spit up and oh my gosh how was I going to do this? A lot of it in large part because of the expectations I had (much like the author of the post says).
I started off being honest about my baby blues. And then someone asked me, "did you ever feel like hurting him?"
No you moron. I'm not psychotic. I was just sad. It wasn't all rainbows and butterflies. It was hard. And once the adrenaline wore off, exhausting.
After that I didn't say much. And honestly I didn't start feeling like myself again, confident and even keeled, until about 8 months postpartum.
And I loved him, but did I love him like I love him now? It doesn't seem possible. He is such a great little boy. With amazing interests and an amazing ability to learn. He shares, and loves animals and the outdoors. He loves big trucks and waves at cars. I did not know these things about him to love them about him at his birth. So how could I have?
But one of the last lines in the post is "no wonder postpartum is rampant."
People have such a misunderstanding about postpartum depression. It's just one more thing that women impose on themselves and set themselves up to fail. We judge each other for it. How could she not feel anything but happiness? Because sometimes it just doesn't work that way.
I wasn't happy. Nope. In the weeks after my sons birth I was not. happy. I loved my son. Knew him to be mine. But I felt this incredible responsibility to take incredible care of him and he cried and he spit up and oh my gosh how was I going to do this? A lot of it in large part because of the expectations I had (much like the author of the post says).
I started off being honest about my baby blues. And then someone asked me, "did you ever feel like hurting him?"
No you moron. I'm not psychotic. I was just sad. It wasn't all rainbows and butterflies. It was hard. And once the adrenaline wore off, exhausting.
After that I didn't say much. And honestly I didn't start feeling like myself again, confident and even keeled, until about 8 months postpartum.
And I loved him, but did I love him like I love him now? It doesn't seem possible. He is such a great little boy. With amazing interests and an amazing ability to learn. He shares, and loves animals and the outdoors. He loves big trucks and waves at cars. I did not know these things about him to love them about him at his birth. So how could I have?
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