Mommy Files
Sleep - not getting any - is my biggest fear. If Grady doesn't sleep, I can't sleep. Even if I'm not in there with him, I lay awake listening to the baby monitor, watching the next days plans go up in smoke. I wrote a tiny bit about our sleep adventures in the beginning. And then our sleep training got to be too depressing. And I got too tired.
But here's our path:
For the first three months Grady did what all little babies do; slept anywhere and everywhere. He was awake more than most kids, I think, but he slept his fair share. Letting mommy and daddy go out to eat frequently, go just about anywhere really. He was portable. He'd sleep in the car seat. I wish we'd taken greater advantage.
At about 10 weeks old he "woke up." He became aware of his enviornment and that he could affect it. Toys! Dogs! Mom! Dad! And he didn't know how to sleep. He couldn't get through a sleep cycle. He was waking up every 30 minutes in some cases, at night it improved slightly to every two hours. Some of this I think was hunger, he had already doubled his birth weight by 10 weeks and I just don't think milk was cutting it for him. I also do not think all breast milk is created equal, and I think what he was getting was pretty lean.
He was a cranky, sleep deprived child. I was a walking zombie. I have never thanked God so much that I am a SAHM. I could bring him into bed with me at 4AM and we could just sleep together until he woke up. Sometimes until 9AM. This morning "cheating" as I called it probably saved us.
But then, he got it. We did very little CIO but at about 6 months I could really tell the difference between when he needed me and when he didn't. And he started sleeping for 12 hours. He started taking two, two hour naps during the day (obviously not ALL the time - he did mutiny every now and then). Paradise is a baby on a schedule.
And it got easy. Too easy. I knew it was going to get hard again.
And so it has. Mobility has brought a new challenge. Little man can sit himself up, stand up, crawl, and tries to take steps by himself. All of this enables him to fight me on sleep. He gets sleepy, and I lay him down. Used to be, he'd lay there for 10-15 minutes and then peacefully drift off to sleep. No crying required.
Now? He immediately sits himself up. No crying. But he just sits up. Plays with his sleep sack. Tries to scratch his legs (so sad, excema). He doesn't cry. He drifts off to sleep sitting up, his head lolls forward, and he then snaps awake again, afraid he's going to fall over.
This goes on FOR HOURS. At least it has for the last week.
Most people laugh at the image of a tot sitting up trying to sleep. It is so frustrating to me. I know I will laugh someday too. But right now this newest phase is so bizarre and frustrating. Lewis has been a huge help, going and laying him down and trying to keep him there. And he has been more sucessful than me usually. But last night nothing worked.
So I flipped him over, put him on his tummy, patted his back until he let out a huge sigh and then walked away. This didn't last long, 45 minutes later he was sitting up again. And we left him alone. The kid has not slept well, nap or bedtime, in a week. He was so exhausted, but another hour of sitting up, his head lolling forward and backward, he finally collapsed forward, landing face first on his mattress, his head cenimeters from the railings, his foot sticking out one of the slats, and slept until 7AM.
I think. I can not be sure that he did not sit up before that and just not make a loud enough noise for the monitor to pick up.
I write this here, so that my readers who have a similar issue or who know someone who has a similar issue, can say, Oh my friend had that happen to them! Or they can comment here and say, "Stacy, this happened to me and it does pass. Promise."
We are not through it. This is not over. Nap time is a problem. Today, I laid him on his tummy after twenty minutes sitting up and patted his back until he fell asleep. This is dangerous to me. I don't want to start a bad habit. But he needs to sleep. And he will sit up quietly in his crib and do NOTHING for over an hour if I left him. He won't sleep. He'll stare around his room, babble quietly to himself, chew on his pjs. So it's not like he'll cry himself to sleep. Cry and wear himself out. He just SITS THERE. If he was older and didn't really NEED the nap it'd be one thing. But he needs to sleep. And he doesn't. He just ... sits there, head lolling sometimes, snapping himself awake as he leans to fall.
It's incredibly frustrating. In a positive, he's not demanding to be held, or demanding to be fed, or demanding to nurse (we are weaning so I was a little afraid that might happen). He just ... can't lay himself back down, and wants to sit up. I mean he could sit up and start to scream (this may happen soon - pray it does not!). So it could be much worse.
I have a terrific son, who is happy, smiley, loves his parents and his dog. I do not mean to complain. But sleep problems scare the life out of me, and worry me to no end. I hope I'm not starting bad habits that are difficult to break. But I will do just about anything to get him the sleep he (and I) need.
Side note: I think sleeping him on his tummy is key. But it freaks me out. We slept him on his tummy a handfull of times when he was real little (<3mos) and it scared me. And he started doing fine on his back so we slept him on his back. I know he's a year old, he's old enough to handle it. He can roll himself over or move if his breathing gets obstructed.
But it still freaks me out. I'm going to keep doing it because it's working and like I said he's old enough. Nervous first time mommy I guess.
But here's our path:
For the first three months Grady did what all little babies do; slept anywhere and everywhere. He was awake more than most kids, I think, but he slept his fair share. Letting mommy and daddy go out to eat frequently, go just about anywhere really. He was portable. He'd sleep in the car seat. I wish we'd taken greater advantage.
At about 10 weeks old he "woke up." He became aware of his enviornment and that he could affect it. Toys! Dogs! Mom! Dad! And he didn't know how to sleep. He couldn't get through a sleep cycle. He was waking up every 30 minutes in some cases, at night it improved slightly to every two hours. Some of this I think was hunger, he had already doubled his birth weight by 10 weeks and I just don't think milk was cutting it for him. I also do not think all breast milk is created equal, and I think what he was getting was pretty lean.
He was a cranky, sleep deprived child. I was a walking zombie. I have never thanked God so much that I am a SAHM. I could bring him into bed with me at 4AM and we could just sleep together until he woke up. Sometimes until 9AM. This morning "cheating" as I called it probably saved us.
But then, he got it. We did very little CIO but at about 6 months I could really tell the difference between when he needed me and when he didn't. And he started sleeping for 12 hours. He started taking two, two hour naps during the day (obviously not ALL the time - he did mutiny every now and then). Paradise is a baby on a schedule.
And it got easy. Too easy. I knew it was going to get hard again.
And so it has. Mobility has brought a new challenge. Little man can sit himself up, stand up, crawl, and tries to take steps by himself. All of this enables him to fight me on sleep. He gets sleepy, and I lay him down. Used to be, he'd lay there for 10-15 minutes and then peacefully drift off to sleep. No crying required.
Now? He immediately sits himself up. No crying. But he just sits up. Plays with his sleep sack. Tries to scratch his legs (so sad, excema). He doesn't cry. He drifts off to sleep sitting up, his head lolls forward, and he then snaps awake again, afraid he's going to fall over.
This goes on FOR HOURS. At least it has for the last week.
Most people laugh at the image of a tot sitting up trying to sleep. It is so frustrating to me. I know I will laugh someday too. But right now this newest phase is so bizarre and frustrating. Lewis has been a huge help, going and laying him down and trying to keep him there. And he has been more sucessful than me usually. But last night nothing worked.
So I flipped him over, put him on his tummy, patted his back until he let out a huge sigh and then walked away. This didn't last long, 45 minutes later he was sitting up again. And we left him alone. The kid has not slept well, nap or bedtime, in a week. He was so exhausted, but another hour of sitting up, his head lolling forward and backward, he finally collapsed forward, landing face first on his mattress, his head cenimeters from the railings, his foot sticking out one of the slats, and slept until 7AM.
I think. I can not be sure that he did not sit up before that and just not make a loud enough noise for the monitor to pick up.
I write this here, so that my readers who have a similar issue or who know someone who has a similar issue, can say, Oh my friend had that happen to them! Or they can comment here and say, "Stacy, this happened to me and it does pass. Promise."
We are not through it. This is not over. Nap time is a problem. Today, I laid him on his tummy after twenty minutes sitting up and patted his back until he fell asleep. This is dangerous to me. I don't want to start a bad habit. But he needs to sleep. And he will sit up quietly in his crib and do NOTHING for over an hour if I left him. He won't sleep. He'll stare around his room, babble quietly to himself, chew on his pjs. So it's not like he'll cry himself to sleep. Cry and wear himself out. He just SITS THERE. If he was older and didn't really NEED the nap it'd be one thing. But he needs to sleep. And he doesn't. He just ... sits there, head lolling sometimes, snapping himself awake as he leans to fall.
It's incredibly frustrating. In a positive, he's not demanding to be held, or demanding to be fed, or demanding to nurse (we are weaning so I was a little afraid that might happen). He just ... can't lay himself back down, and wants to sit up. I mean he could sit up and start to scream (this may happen soon - pray it does not!). So it could be much worse.
I have a terrific son, who is happy, smiley, loves his parents and his dog. I do not mean to complain. But sleep problems scare the life out of me, and worry me to no end. I hope I'm not starting bad habits that are difficult to break. But I will do just about anything to get him the sleep he (and I) need.
Side note: I think sleeping him on his tummy is key. But it freaks me out. We slept him on his tummy a handfull of times when he was real little (<3mos) and it scared me. And he started doing fine on his back so we slept him on his back. I know he's a year old, he's old enough to handle it. He can roll himself over or move if his breathing gets obstructed.
But it still freaks me out. I'm going to keep doing it because it's working and like I said he's old enough. Nervous first time mommy I guess.
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